Angels are a bag of dicks.

[ And so is Heaven. He doesn't think he needs to ask if Sam knows that Heaven left their world to Lucifer because it was obvious when that happened. He watched Cas fall, and he hadn't been there to help him back up again, already too entrenched in his own obsession.

He'd failed so many people.

His throat clamps up, holds the lump that's there in stasis before he has to swallow hard to get it back down again. Between the three of them, he has no idea how they get back to something functional. But he's trying.

What he thinks of Cas, or what Cas thinks of him... it's complicated. Thing is, Sam hadn't been around to see what his brother had turned into, what he'd done to Cas by not being around. His absence of attention had shaped Cas just as much as his presence would have.

He knows what Cas is now? That's on him. He's got enough balls to confess this to Sam though. ]

Things weren't exactly a walk in the park between me and him back home.

[ He pauses, eyes fixing on the cooling stew in front of him. ]

I fed him to Croats as a diversion.